We’ve all experienced a cringe-worthy moment at one stage or another and some of us experience them more frequently than most. So, how do you survive awkward social situations? Etiquette expert and owner of Sydney Model and Etiquette College Val Edwards joins us in the studio to explain.
What do you do when you have been caught lying
According to Val, you're already in the deep end at this point and it's your choice if you want to fabricate more, but it's not the ethical thing to do. Just be honest. In a polite, humble way simply admit that you lied and explain your reasoning behind the fib.
What to do when you have congratulated somebody on their baby bump, only to discover that they're not actually pregnant
If you've already congratulated them, eat a little bit of humble pie! You should always remember that if you're unsure if they're pregnant, just say, 'You're looking really well'. Be suggestive but if you've already said it, you could always cover up with a white lie and say you've heard a little whisper.
What to do when you have been caught talking about somebody behind their back, either in person or via email
Admit that you were wrong and profusely apologise. Try to draw on their good points as some form of compensation!
What is the right etiquette when meeting someone new? What to do if they approach you with a kiss
You should always shake hands! This rule applies to both men and women. A firm handshake says they have very good character. But if somebody approaches you with a kiss on the cheek, you have to go along with it. It would be rude to push them away. But if they go in for a kiss on the lips, you need to be quick! Turn your head.
What to do when you have attended an event, only to discover that you are over or under-dressed
If you're overdressed and you can take something off, then do so. Take excess jewellery off, for example. Try and have this done before you enter the entertaining area. If you can't do this, simply excuse yourself for being inappropriately dressed.
Ultimately, it's really important to do your homework. Know what it is you're attending and always ask what the dress code is. If it's a verbal invitation, ask where the event will take place and what you should wear.
Coming across somebody you are trying to avoid
Be polite, but don't go out of your way to speak to them.
Seeing your ex with a new partner
Be polite, but certainly don't join the group with whom he is talking.
Attending the event in the same dress as someone else
Say “What good taste you have or we both shop at the BEST shop don't we - with a smile!
More of Val's etiquette tips
- It's proper etiquette to invite guests to both the wedding ceremony, whether it be in a church or on the beach and afterwards for the reception. On the other hand i.e. if you were a school teacher and you were getting married and the children in the class were very excited, it would be nice for them to go to the church to see their teacher ‘get married’. It could be the church attached to the school where the teacher teaches.
- In other social situations, it is good manners to welcome a guest (at the door) to a party you are hosting, and introduce them into a group nearby who are already in discussion. You do this by excusing yourself, introducing the new guest by saying something about his job or family to find common ground.
- In social situations always be interested in the person with whom you are speaking, don't continually talk about yourself. You learn more by listening than talking.
- In social situations when dining never start to eat until your host starts and never finish the meal until the host finishes. NEVER cut a bread roll with a knife and NEVER butter it completely, only butter small mouthfuls as you wish to eat it.
- NEVER speak with your mouth full, always finish the mouthful then answer the question.
- NEVER wave cutlery around in mid air, always rest your cutlery in the middle of the meal on the plate with the tynes turned down. Finishing the meal with the tynes of the fork up and the knife and fork together.
- If you like snails make sure you hold the snail with the left hand and use the small tongs provided to eat the snail with the right hand - remember the situation in the movie Pretty Woman?
- When seated at the table at a dinner party it is bad manners to just talk to the person on one side. You should always try to speak to the people on both sides.
- If you are served with something you don't like e.g. brains or lambs fry, you should try to LOOK as though you are eating it by moving it around the plate. It would be rude to just not make an effort.
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